He Just Doesn’t Understand Me

love signsYou probably guessed it………………another one about love!  So, I  called my sister because I was having  “This man in on my last nerve and I’m feeling like I want to sign them papers like Usher” moments.  All I wanted to do was to vent instead I received her “not to welcomed philosophy” on marriage. 

Well the conversation started a little something like this, “Deon do not understand me and my needs”.  She simply responded, “No, you don’t understand him.”  I was shocked, because all I wanted to do was vent and she switched the fault on me.  Her argument was, as women we know our men and their capabilities.  Why ask him to drive at 100 miles per hour when he can only push 60 miles per hour?  Even though I could understand where she was coming from, I begged to differ.  My thing is that it’s not that they are not capable of going 100 miles per hour, they are just too comfortable at going 60 miles per hour.  Just imagine if men gave their 100% in there relationship or just even matched their partner’s effort, as women we would be more fulfilled in our relationships.  I mean, just imagine if women did not pull our weight in the relationship.  The house will be chaotic (and don’t forget dirty!); the kids would run a muck; and motivation would just be a lingering memory! So ladies, we don’t have to accept our men’s mess because that’s what we have been conditioned to do.  A woman’s worth is not calculated by her ability to ignore her man’s shortcomings, but to make them accountable for them.  We have to speak up for ourselves and share our feelings about whatever they are doing that hurt our self esteem and self worth.  We do not have to ACCEPT their laziness and selfishness and leaving is not always the answer, positive confrontation is the answer.  So confront, be consistent, and engage in lots of prayer!  Just like we are bold and consistent with the kids, family, friends, and careers; we need to be just as bold in our relationships with our men! Ladies let me know how you feel about this one!

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