Judging People With Your Own Insecurities

Okay, so I was having a conversation with one of my students (keep in mind that they are middle schoolers) and one of the boys refered to himself as “ugly”.  His main issue with his appearance was his receiving hair-line, in fact his exact words were, “Ms. Kinsey, my hairline is furred (that means messed up), it starts all the way back here”.  Although, it hurt me that our children are so critical with their looks and learn in an early age to dislike themselves, I was more concerned with what happened next.  The same little boy who hated his hair-line, turn around and made fun of another student’s hairline.  He taunted the poor little boy until the class was in an uproar of laughter. The lightbulb in my head went off and I realized that not only children, but adults do this.  We make fun of and highlight the flaws in others that we have in ourselves.  Don’t act like you don’t, I have made fun of a specific gospel singer’s wide nose when my wide nose is one of my biggest insecurities.  What would make me act so harshly, knowing that I would probably be in tears if someone pointed out my wide nose?  I’ll tell you why; it makes one better and comforted to know that someone has it worst than you (or you think they have it worse than you).  It’s so hard to look in the mirror and face the very truth that makes you cringe and not want to look at yourself.  But, as human beings, we must use the same compassion towards others that we want for ourselves, even if a person reminds you of the insecurities that hurt our self perception.  We must learn to love everything about ourselves because if you learn how to stand up to your own insecurities, we would live much more fulfilling lives and hurt less people.  Just something to think about.

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